• Sanctus@lemmy.world
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    3 days ago

    Am I vastly underestimating the gorilla here? 100 men? We’re swarming that dude like ants. His eyes are getting poked out in the first 30 seconds.

    • Klear@lemmy.world
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      3 days ago

      We’re swarming that dude like ants.

      Are we? Or are we standing awkwardly in a circle, waiting for some other dumbass to make the first move, because the first guy to make a move is not gonna have a fun time.

      • bampop@lemmy.world
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        2 days ago

        If not fighting is an option, I guess the men will stand in a crowd making noise and the gorilla will just chill in his corner. I suppose you have to assume that all parties are 100% committed to violence

        • LifeInMultipleChoice@lemmy.world
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          2 days ago

          I’m not sure what I should do in this scenario so I’m going to wait until Hillary Clinton tweets her opinion so I know what’s best for me.

          /This was hard to type, I’m hoping it gets down voted out of principle haha

        • baines@lemmy.cafe
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          2 days ago

          locked in a room, after the first day of real hunger that gorilla starts to maybe look like a good idea

          • bampop@lemmy.world
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            2 days ago

            Now there’s an interesting scenario. In the short term, you might have better luck trying to eat your fellow humans, rather than confronting the gorilla. Which seems like an analogy for how certain types of government stay in power…

      • BowtiesAreCool@lemmy.world
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        1 day ago

        If this was like a simulation and no single individual our their own safety above the group goal, then yeah. The crowd simply encircles and closes in on the gorilla, and some of the first will almost certainly die

        • Klear@lemmy.world
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          2 days ago

          People who want to fistfight a gorilla aren’t probably too big on planning.

          • Ensign_Crab@lemmy.world
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            2 days ago

            See, I didn’t see “slappers only” as a requirement, considering that the dudes in the cave painting were usin’ spears.

      • bountygiver [any]@lemmy.ml
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        2 days ago

        Well the gorilla will make the first move in that case, and if you don’t make the move while it is busy mauling the unlucky first, you could be next.

        Oh who am I kiding? With how involved most people are in politics, they would not make a move until it is too late.

      • Sludgeyy@lemmy.world
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        2 days ago

        Assuming it’s a small arena battle to the death, yes. Do or Die.

        If it was a open world battle then the 100 people would just take turns harassing the gorilla until it dies of exhaustion. That wouldn’t be a fair fight at all. Gorilla might get a handful of people but he’s just exhausting myself more.

      • theUwUhugger@lemmy.world
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        2 days ago

        With a bit of organization? Some guys distract it, others hit its head from behind!With a bit of luck we could start raping it after like 30 secs!

        I am not saying we should, that would be disgusting! I am saying we could

    • MintyFresh@lemmy.world
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      2 days ago

      One of the things that sets the human animal apart is throwing things. That poor gorilla is getting pelted with a million rocks. RIP hambre sr.

      • pyre@lemmy.world
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        2 days ago

        the whole premise is that it’s hand-to-hand. if weapons are allowed there’s no question to begin with. it’s 1 man vs 1 gorilla and the man wins.

      • shalafi@lemmy.world
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        2 days ago

        Unless handicapped, any human child can throw a ball, catch a ball, throw a stick strait. No other animal even comes close.

        And here I am feeling sorry for myself because I can’t throw a cast net properly. :(

      • Honytawk@lemmy.zip
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        2 days ago

        Humans aren’t made of paper.

        Even swinging a metal girder wouldn’t kill 10 men in one go, just the first few and maim a couple more.

      • MotoAsh@lemmy.world
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        2 days ago

        Even if that were true, there’d be 90 others getting clean hits in. Yea, many guys aren’t walking away from a bare knuckled fight with a gorilla, but the point is, neither is the one gorilla.

        • TranscendentalEmpire@lemmy.today
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          2 days ago

          Lol, in this scenario the majority of the injuries/deaths would be from the stampede of people running away from the gorilla after seeing it disembowel someone.

          This is like someone saying why don’t groups of people always just rush someone with an ar-15?

          • MotoAsh@lemmy.world
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            2 days ago

            No, this is a planned fight to the death. Only an idiot assumes only pansies are signing up for it. If the gorilla is equally informed and willing about the situation, the gorilla looses.

            • TranscendentalEmpire@lemmy.today
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              2 days ago

              No, this is a planned fight to the death. Only an idiot assumes only pansies are signing up for it.

              How many people do you think actually have experiences with a “fight to the death”, and how many people insane enough to sign up for this would just be people overestimating their own skills and bravery?

              gorilla is equally informed and willing about the situation, the gorilla looses.

              My guy… it’s a gorilla. A gorilla cannot be as equally informed and willing as a person. What are you going to do, make it sign a contract?

              • JcbAzPx@lemmy.world
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                2 days ago

                How many people do you think actually have experiences with a “fight to the death”,

                Of the ~8 billion people in the world, I’d say more than 100.

              • MotoAsh@lemmy.world
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                2 days ago

                You’re continuing to miss the point entirely… Good job choosing to be a dumbass.

                A gorilla is one of the more peaceful apes. More peaceful than humans. If anything, an uninformed gorilla would perform worse, so thanks for inadvertently proving my point while continuing to misunderstand it.

                • TranscendentalEmpire@lemmy.today
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                  2 days ago

                  A gorilla is one of the more peaceful apes. More peaceful than humans.

                  Unless provoked… Not many people are stupid enough to provoke a male silverback.

                  uninformed gorilla would perform worse, so thanks for inadvertently proving my point while continuing to misunderstand it.

                  Uninformed? How exactly are a hundred people going to pull off a sneak attack on a gorilla?

                  • MotoAsh@lemmy.world
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                    2 days ago

                    How long do gorilla fights last? Since I know you won’t look it up, I’ll give you an important hint: far shorter than human fights.