Fridging is when a love interest gets killed just to push the main character forward. It used to mean a woman getting hurt to make a man act. Now it covers any partner dying to pump up the plot.

Here’s the cold truth. A romantic loss is the only loss that actually justifies losing your head over it. If your boyfriend or girlfriend dies, that grief can spiral into obsession or a need for revenge. That is story fuel. Everything else is background noise.

An uncle, a child, a best friend, a parent, a teammate getting killed is not tragic nor is it enough to be sad and enough to motivate you to be a hero. Those losses might be a little sad but they do not automatically justify turning your life into this crusade against injustice. They are not dramatic enough to demand you drop everything and hunt a killer down.

So yeah, fridging as a device works because romantic love is one of the few things audiences treat as absolute.

Whenever there is a story about a main character who is depressed because their best friend, parent, or child dies, I just can’t get into it, and I’m always like, “Please get over it,” because this isn’t enough to be depressed over, and it’s not enough to want to become a good person.

  • spittingimage@lemmy.world
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    2 days ago

    An uncle, a child, a best friend, a parent, a teammate getting killed is not tragic

    That’s a unique take, to say the least.

  • themeatbridge@lemmy.world
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    2 days ago

    What the chicken fried fuck are you talking about?

    Fridging is a form of reductionist misogyny. It’s not just that somebody died, it’s that a woman existed only to die in a brutal fashion.

    • Grimreaper@sopuli.xyzOP
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      1 day ago

      My point is that only a romantic partner can truly be the sole motivator to become a hero or to seek revenge. I don’t necessarily disagree that fridging is misogynistic, but honestly, a platonic loved one dying is not a strong enough reason to want revenge or to become a hero.

  • FreshParsnip@lemmy.ca
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    2 days ago

    What an awful take. I hope you aren’t a parent if you expect a parent to just get over the loss of their child. You don’t expect people to be motivated by loss of any loved one other than a romantic partner? Really? No other kind of love is strong enough for you? I’ve reached my limit of stupid for tonight.

    • Grimreaper@sopuli.xyzOP
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      1 day ago

      You don’t expect people to be motivated by loss of any loved one other than a romantic partner? Really? No other kind of love is strong enough for you?

      Honestly, no, I’m not saying friends or family members aren’t important, but they aren’t important enough to decide to get revenge, avenge or put on a costume to fight crime for. Or to just change your life around and be a good person

      In my opinion only romantic love should do that.

      My problem with Spider-Man is that Uncle Ben is the central motivation for Peter, and in my opinion, it’s dumb. I honestly don’t think Peter should have even gone to confront the killer. An uncle or any family member isn’t worth that.

      • SGforce@lemmy.ca
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        1 day ago

        At first I thought you just didn’t give a shit. Now I just think you’re a coward.

        • squaresinger@lemmy.world
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          1 day ago

          Tbh, I think OP is 15, has no real friends yet and has a rocky relationship with their family. And probably is in a relationship for the first time, still totaly high off the butterflies in their stomach.

  • 🇰 🌀 🇱 🇦 🇳 🇦 🇰 🇮 @pawb.social
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    2 days ago

    Sounds like you need to read The Count of Monte Cristo.

    It is the epitome of a revenge story and it doesn’t need to kill the love interest to work. In fact, it works better because his wife doesn’t die but remarried the fucker who ruined his life.

    Moby Dick, too. Pretty sure the whale didn’t kill Ahab’s wife.

  • latenightnoir@lemmy.blahaj.zone
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    1 day ago

    How about just be decent for the fuck of it? Why should we need reasons to be good people?

    Edit: take classic Superman, for instance. That dude is good simply because he’s good. He’s the type of person who’d apologise if you walked into them and mean it, not because they’re a pushover, but because why the hell not.

    • Grimreaper@sopuli.xyzOP
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      1 day ago

      How about just be decent for the fuck of it? Why should we need reasons to be good people?

      There is a difference between being a good person and going out of your way to get revenge for someone.

  • TheDoozer@lemmy.world
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    1 day ago

    I would absolutely react more to my child getting killed than literally anyone else on the planet, what are you on about?

    Though in fairness, if I had powers, I don’t think it would be a pursuit of justice or launch me on some path of heroism. Somebody would just die badly (assuming the initial killing was either deliberate or through willful neglect).

  • rumschlumpel@feddit.org
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    2 days ago

    The relationship with your kid should be deeper than with your partner. Nowadays, many people have far more partners during their lifetime than children - you’ll never know whether your partner will still be with you in 10 years, but it’s very unlikely that your child will not be yours anymore. Similar with parents.

    I will say that family members who aren’t love interests typically don’t get enough time and characterization to make the audience care much about them.

  • phanto@lemmy.ca
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    1 day ago

    I’m interpreting this as trolling. No way is someone who isn’t trying to start shit going to put something like this out in the world, unless there is something seriously skewed in their worldview. Dude, if this is how you have fun, get bent. If you mean this, get help.

  • the_riviera_kid@lemmy.world
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    1 day ago

    The fuck kind of fucked up bullshit are you on about? You would honestly see some one kill your parents, friends, or kids and just shrug your shoulders? There is something deeply wrong with you.

  • Mr Fish@lemmy.world
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    1 day ago

    I’m not gonna bother with saying that the other losses that you’re discounting can be just as tragic as losing a romantic partner. Everyone else here has said it probably better than I could.

    What I’ll bring up is that not only are there more kinds of revenge motivation than the loss of someone close to you, there are more motivations than just revenge. For other kinds of revenge, what about wounded honour? A hunter who’s prey keeps escaping them might feel the need to finally end that hunt before they can look themselves in the eye. That’s its own form of revenge arc, and it can make just as powerful a story as avenging the loss of a loved one. And for non revenge motivations, there’s far too many to list, but here’s a start

    • duty
    • repaying a debt to the world
    • self improvement
    • survival (usually more of a side character motive compared to a hero protagonist, but still good)
    • seeking admiration (from people in general or from a few important people)