3 would get you through almost any door. Definitely my choice.
7 though, this would make you a star in the DEA. Imagine seeing inside everyone’s tires, and then you find one you can’t see inside. “Whatcha got in those tires, son?” I’m sure there could be other uses.
2, you could run a business on free gravel but you’re mostly paying for processing and delivery so you would only have a small edge on your competition. It’s still a lot of work and big heavy expensive trucks.
Depends on what is meant by “free gravel”, though. Given the effects of the other pills, it gives me the impression I can just summon gravel on command. In which case, I’d only have to pay for my own transportation.
I thought the same thing about 3 until I realized that I’m more than 7 inches tall/wide/deep, so I can’t actually pass through anything, just get horribly mangled when I make it halfway through the door.
Now here’s the million dollar question: how many times per second can I teleport? Because if I can teleport at let’s say 1khz… now we’re talking
ANY toaster. If you go to a wedding or any formal event with drinks, you can control whoever’s giving the toast. That could be pretty powerful.
Puppeteering at its finest.
Also, anything that generates enough heat in the presence of bread is, in fact, a toaster.
Teleport 7 inches away easy lock in:
Teleport up 7 inches on a generator perpetual motion machine.
Walk through thin walls / safes.
Repeatedly teleport forwards never have to walk again.
Teleport out of bed every morning.
Teleport out of clothes at night / sexy times
Look cool AF.
Unless your body is less than 7 inches wide, all but the first and third one of those is going to involve nightmarish scenarios of walls, clothes, etc. getting stuck in your body.
Does momentum reset after a teleport? Could I jump off a cliff and teleport left and right like going down stairs?
Then teleport again
Hell, not even that. You could become a world class boxer or UFC fighter. You can basically slip any punch or attack instantly and you can teleport your fists into the sweet spot to score a knockout. You would be an amazing baseball player as well, you can teleport to perfectly hit any ball at just the right angle. As a quarterback you would be insane too, you can readjust to any play instantly. In fencing you’d basically be unstoppable, you can dodge everything. For any sport or physical activity being able to teleport 7 inches is insanely overpowered. The person who came up with this doesn’t play any sports.
Free gravel for life could be a game changer.
You still pay the shipping fees.
The pill said nothing about that.
Okay, I’ll bite this time.
- Don’t see any use.
- Sell gravel. Become rich.
- If no cooldown you can spam and teleport anywhere as long as there’s a path between A and B
- Not sure.
- Turning on every toaster in the world at the same time would probably cripple the various power grids globally.
- If it stacks you could look quite young.
- Could probably make some money checking if safes are empty or not. Doesn’t say anything about distance. Could remotely check containers for people. Depends as well on the definition of empty.
- Would be hugely beneficial to some archeologists.
- For anyone who is unable to walk currently this would be good. What happens if you cut your legs off? Can you fly afterwards?
- Don’t see any use.
Not sureMight be useful, but who nose.
FTFY
- …Depends as well on the definition of empty.
“Yep, another container that does not contain a perfect vacuum. Should have taken the free gravel pill…”
If you pick 9 and then cut your legs off, you’ll have the ability to run as fast as Albert Einstein with his legs cut off could.
Imagine how fast that guy could go if he devoted his life to building performance accessibility aids instead of pursuing physics. He probably would have robotic cybernetic legs that outperformed any human runners.
Unless he was as skilled in robotics and engineering as a fish was at climbing trees.
I could do so much with free gravel, you have no idea.
If you have even the most-basic business sense, this instantly turns you into an uber-wealthy gravel tycoon.
Putting a toaster inside a robot so I can control it with my mind and have an army of these
3 and 5 can be overpowered if the superpower has no cooldown or limit
2, 7, 8 can assure you big wealth in some jobs
1, 4, 6 doesn’t appear to be very useful, and having a second nose could be quite inconvenient on the forehead, in the armpit or above the arse, while being very parasocial
9: While i think running at the speed of albert einstein relative to the earth would be kind of meh, i would reconsider if it is Albert’s running speed relative to the moon
Can I take a pill that gives me a whole sub for discussing these?
I would be the Gravel King. You need gravel, you come to me. I would be a benevolent king though. I would grant gravel to those that need it.
Exactly. This one is infinite money glitch
It doesn’t say the quantity, though. It might be a very small amount every so often. But, if that’s not the case, and if we also get to choose where the gravel appears, then I’m using it to construct a man made island out in international waters.
Yeah, the devil is in the details. Is there a cooldown? Are there quantity limitations? Location could be interesting because you could put ten tons of gravel a mile high and drop it. You could have Nasa pay you to quickly assemble a compacted gravel mini-moon at a lagrange point for a space dock.
Or maybe you get gravel in the same sense that someone could own Jupiter or a star. “You now own all the gravel in that quary!” But it doesn’t inform the workers of that fact, or the officials who still rely on whatever paperwork was filled out by the agents of the guy who paid them to ensure the quary belongs to his corporation’s corporation. The whole idea of ownership is pretty abstract in the first place.
Could be that every pill just means that, under the jurisdiction of the entity who made the pills, you are legally allowed to do what the pills claim, though you need to figure out the rest from there, and people from other jurisdictions are able to disagree even if you do figure out the how.
Are we talking about Albert Einstein in his prime, or Albert Einstein now?
Could we put Einstein’s bones in a centrifuge, and run at 200km/h?
Free gravel, then sell it. Just make sure to not summon too much gravel so the price doesn’t go down.
Easy, free gravel. Become a gravel salesman.
Would be interesting to see how it appears though. Can I get to just point to a spot and suddenly gravel? If so, charge people for the show too. Just rock up to their house, point at the driveway and boom, gravel. Easy money.
Added bonus: don’t like someone? Boom, house literally full of gravel.
Gravel.
Just says that the gravel is free, not that you can generate it or make it appear. You’ve got a lifetime supply of gravel from suppliers but you still gotta move it around
Still a free product. Normally gravel traders have to purchase the gravel, move it and sell it. Now you just have to move and sell it. Massive profits. Transport fees are for the customer too, so basically free as well.
And you’d be able to undercut any competition and corner the market.
That’s sounds like a recipe to be Jimmy Hoffa’d
Built a greenhouse with a gravel foundation this summer. Doesn’t matter if I have to move it. Free gravel is useful.
What if it can’t change to paid gravel? Like you try to sell it and people are like if it was free I’d take it, but I won’t pay for that.
The bonus is just how I kill people in minecraft.
You will have free grave in north Korea
I don’t want to deal with people tho
The teleport 7 inches thing might be nice for getting through locked doors
I worry about those who are thicker than 7 inches. That might cause some Cloverfield Paradox shit, where your innards wind up fuzed with a door. Skinny folks only.
I mean, it doesn’t say there’s a cooldown, so in theory you could just spam it a shitton of times and no matter how thick the door is, you’ll get through it.
Unless you mix with the door and all molecules in your body mess up and you die.
The Door.
Hodor.
You know what happens if you suddenly double the number of incompressible molecules in a given area? I don’t, but I can imagine it would be explosive.
Yeah, it’d be really important to understand how the 7 inches are measured. Like…is it 7 inches in the same way I mean 7 inches when I say it? Or more like a literal-on-a-ruler 7 inches?
You appear in the closest unoccupied space.
The closest unoccupied space appears to be a safe in the wall
But there’s air. Where does the air go? Maybe you can only teleport in space.
That is exactly what I though. There are benefits to this one for sure.
Free gravel is so busted compared to the rest. Gravel’s one of those things that you don’t need often, but someone in any town on any given day will need some.
You could undercut every single other gravel business. Even if the competitions lowers their prices dramatically, they can’t go lower than their costs. Meanwhile, you have absolutely no costs on material. Gravel monopoly.
If there are no limits of scale or delivery, i think it’s OP.
cut me off? I’m gonna follow you at a disance and summon 50 tons of gravel around your car.
File an HOA complaint on me? You’re going to need a bobcat to find your front door.
Can i summon it anywhere without going there? You know how hard it is to get rid of gravel?
You’re going to need a bobcat to find your front door.
I forgot that was a brand of front loaders for a second, and my brain went on a whole trip trying to figure why you’d need a bobcat.
Ah, the ancient proverb. “May thine abode be buried so significantly in granite that thy’ll required services of a feline predator to findeth thou stoop.”
To be fair, I think AESOP might have written a few stranger things.
;)
Can i summon it anywhere without going there?
And do you create matter from nothing or do you relocate preexisting gravel? I see a way to virtually free unlimited energy here with the use of gravity batteries.
Drunk as a skunk, Rumba stood in the parking lot, staggering, freshly jilted. Arms raised in the air. Crying, screaming, and laughing maniacally, he urged all the magic showers of stone. They would pay. They would all pay. And he would pay too. But it seemed a small price. The stars begin to twinkle and to procure your passion. The moon, in its full glory tonight, grew by its third in just seconds.
The stars seemed to wink out of existence. First, a couple at a time, then in large swaths. They weren’t gone, but obscured. A few minutes after the last star disappeared from the sky, it was replaced by something wonderful, something magical. Before its impending death, the earth would be subject to it’s last and most amazing light show.
New stars seemed to faintly appear, but they were wrong, beautifully wrong. And they seemed to move, but as they did, they traced magnificent lines in the sky.
He grit his teeth shouldered the cosmic burden once more, as he also dug in his heels and pulled fantasitcally once more at the heavens, demanding the sky come. The lines turned into stripes. The stripes turned into an ever-increasing glow. But he didn’t summon just enough gravel to end the earth. He summoned gravel for hundreds of thousands of miles. Soon, the moon would be just another layer in the crust, and still the gravel would fall. Long after humanity had breathed its last breath, the gravel would still fall. The inner planets and the sun would soon dance an intricate path, and they would eventually merge together with the sun itself. But still, the gravel would fall. Not until some centuries later, once the sun had increased to about 20 times its original mass, would the black hole form that would slowly engulf the rest of the known galaxy.
Bet I could retire in a year, two at the outside. Have customers pick up at deep discount until I could get a pair of heavy trucks and drivers, pure gravy from there on out.
I imagine this working in a monkey’s paw kind of way. First, the local gravel suppliers just keep mis-delivering things to places where you happen to be. Then they start talking and figure out how to get rid of you so you stop costing them so much business. You survive, skip town, only to start again. You get incredibly wealthy from re-selling all this free gravel. Eventually, mountaintops start dissapearing due to all the illegal quarrying going on…
This is much easier to do the monkey paw routine by saying "you get one free piece of gravel per 100 years.:
Not to mention the transport cost, and the usefulness of gravel as fill material on major building and infrastructure projects.
